or how to become comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Introduction
Let's cut to the chase, new skill acquisition, no matter who you are, is a difficult, uncomfortable, mental and sometimes physical task.
Not convinced? Okay, pick up a pen and piece of paper and write your signature, get someone to watch you do it and time how long it takes. Done, good. I'm going to assume that it was really simple if the pen worked and the paper was resting on a table. You've penned that signature thousands of times, it took little conscious effort and, while it may not be perfect, you delivered a signature that looked very close to your normal signature on demand.
Okay, now pick up the pen in your non-dominant hand and try and make an exact replica of the first signature, in the same time frame. Make sure you get the person who watched to time you as you recreate your signature. How did that feel? Were you as quick? How's the quality of the replica? Was there pressure?
Mine was shocking! I had to really think about the second signature and to be honest, it took twice as long but looks nothing like my signature. If I wasn't so competent at the first exercise I may have had less expectation, but having established my skill right handed, my left hand writing was terrible.
Now imagine that you are a top class rugby kicker or footballer and you are asked to kick with your left foot when you are right side dominant. If you can't, your position in the team is under threat. Those individuals wouldn't be human if they didn't feel pressure, discomfort or even sickness.
Welcome to the Ugly Zone.
Why is it called the Ugly Zone?
Sports coaches and psychologists call it the Ugly Zone because of the deep discomfort felt by people who are in that psychological state when trying to develop a new mental or physical skill. The pressure associated with not being able to execute the new skill can make the performer feel clumsy, embarrassed, incompetent and deeply uncomfortable. They may question their ability and start to wonder if they are up to the job. This is the same as getting a promotion at work and wondering if you are up to it (Impostor syndrome).
The reality is as humans we generally like to feel safe and secure, we are happiest when we are comfortable, in our competency zone and not under threat. This is a normal feeling that we would have sought out thousands of years ago as we evolved from cave people who were constantly under threat of attack or harm. For reference think about walking around Newcastle on a Friday night when the pubs shut, to recreate that feeling in a semi-modern setting... terrifying.
The same hormones we released back in the caveman days for fight or flight are still present in our bodies today, it's just we now we release adrenalin when we are stressed by other less deadly situations, such as learning to make a keynote speech in front of 500 delegates with an autocue for the first time.
Sam and Beryl make no mention of keynote speaking in the first edition
Another factor in the psychological impact of the ugly zone is our ego, also known as pride. Put simply, if our ego is threatened by our lack of skill or competency, we will feel less psychologically safe. Which again can trigger our fight (angry) or flight (quit) emotions to get back to safety.
However, while normal people may wish to stay in the safe zone, high performers understand that to improve, reach or stay at the top of their professions, they constantly need to evolve, improve and develop new skills. This is why they need to learn to become comfortable in the uncomfortable zone.
What does the Ugly look and Feel like?
The diagram below indicates what we mean by the ugly zone. Acquiring new skills takes a lot of physical and mental energy; it's draining. There is resistance from the conscious and unconscious mind as we fear failure and feel unsafe. However, the rewards are greater than the pitfalls, without developing new skills we will become stale, be less competitive and eventually be overtaken. There can be no magic without the hard work of working in the Ugly Zone.
Based on an illustration by Dr Dave Alred
Top athletes and business professionals know that they need to learn how to thrive in this space as they will need to visit it lots during their careers.
we can All learn from top sportspeople
Top sports people and the coaches cope better with the Ugly Zone than less capable athletes. Those that make it have already had to evolve continually from an early age. All professional sports run a pyramid system of talent paths that constantly coach and develop youngsters. Those who can't develop reach their peak quicker and drop out of the system.
Here are a few observations that we can all learn from on how top sportspeople handle the Ugly Zone with the help of their coaches.
They learn early that and acknowledge that the process of acquiring a new skill or competency will be uncomfortable - this makes it easier for them to cope when the going gets tough.
They detach their ego from the process and understand they may initially perform poorly, while putting a lot of effort into developing the new skill. Being vulnerable is sometimes part of the process. They resist seeking the comfort of mediocrity.
They commit to and focus on the skill acquisition process, if complicated they often break the new skill into smaller components and work on developing the new skill incrementally, before trying to perform the whole skill end to end. In coaching we call this Whole-Part-Whole. It makes the stages easier to deliver then reassemble.
High performers often detach the skill practice from the outcome. For example, a golfer may completely ignore where the ball goes if they are focusing on trying to increase their swing speed in a practice drill, or a presenter may ignore the quality of the first draft of a presentation when they are getting used to speaking with an autocue. At that point it’s not the final outcome that matters its the new skill development pattern.
High performers measure their progress regularly and track how they are doing versus their targets. It’s really easy to miss improvements if you don’t measure them or if you don’t feel like you are seeing immediate improvements
Finally, they show resilience and don’t give in. They try different tactics if what they are attempting is too challenging, but they keep their eye on the overall goal and commit to the process.
In Summary
Being uncomfortable is an unavoidable state when developing new skills, if you aren't then you probably aren't pushing yourself hard enough. Top athletes recognise this and have tactics with their coaches to make the discomfort tolerable. By using and adapting those tactics business people can also become more resilient and capable of regular evolution without the effort draining them. As they regularly develop new skills during their careers.
In the end I'd like you to see the Ugly Zone as a thing of beauty as this is really where your continued success will come from and your career and life aspirations will be satisfied.
As the stoic Seneca said
"There is a pleasure in having succeeded in enduring something the actual enduring of which was very far from pleasant; when some trouble or other comes to an end the natural thing is to be glad.“
See if you can spot the left handed signature.
My Performance offers Executive Coaching and High Performance programmes. For a free discussion on how My Performance Coach may be able to help you or your team please book a Discovery call using or contact Rich direct at rich@myperformancecoach.uk or via LinkedIn at www.linkedin.com/in/dickiecarlson
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